Mum was one of 4 children. Sadly her sisters Dorothy and Mary passed away in recent years, but she is survived by her brother Eric who lives in Canada. Apart from me, she also leaves her three grandchildren Alex, Olivia and Paul, and her great granddaughter Nella.
Mum was born and went to school in the small seaside town of Dovercourt in Essex. It was there that she gained her love of the sea and became a very powerful swimmer. She loved being able to run down to the beach with her friends at lunchtime, have a swim and be back in school for the afternoon classes.
Mum left school at the young and tender age of 14. At 15 and with the War gaining pace, she went to stay with friends in the relative safety of Oban on the West coast of Scotland, which was a time she often recounted as being a very special part of her life. I’m sure that the sea and the surrounding coast would have been a comforting reminder of home.
In February 1949, at the age of 22, Mum joined the Women’s Royal Air Force Police where she excelled in everything she did. It was in the WRAF that Mum met our father. They lived in Essex for a short period, where Peter and I were born before moving to Surrey where my father joined the Surrey Police force.
Mum had the unending ability to make the best of everything no matter how difficult it may have seemed. Being attached to the Police force brought many challenges in those early years and one was that we moved house 7 times. I can still smell the damp surfaces when Mum cleaned the houses from top to bottom before unpacking our belongings. Mum loved meeting people and making new friends but constantly moving house also meant leaving those friends behind, which she found difficult. Mum dealt with all our practical day to day family issues because my father was always working, or studying for his next set of exams. She did so in the most positive, gracious and encouraging way, which was something that Peter and I were always grateful for. Mum loved attending Church regularly where she would help out with anything she could. She was also proud member of the Mother’s Union.
Over the years, Mum did part time work to help support the family. She cleaned houses, worked in a greengrocers, worked in a clothes shop and picked fruit and potatoes. It may sound odd but I have very fond memories of being absolutely filthy walking behind a tractor picking up the stray potatoes that the machine had missed. It was fun only because Mum made it that way. She was always so positive about everything and always had such a lovely warm and comforting smile on her face.
We returned to Dovercourt regularly to spend holidays and weekends there and to visit Grandma and Aunty Mary. As young children, we have lots of very happy memories of those early days such as building sandcastles, playing in the sea, walking out to the lighthouse at low tide, flying kites, going on the boating lake and the roller-skate rink. Mum was a wonderful cook, and she would also make picnics so we could stay on the beach for as long as possible. Simple pleasures and very happy, special times.
As children of a senior Police officer, Pete and I weren’t allowed much freedom because we had to set a good example all the time. Obviously we didn’t always conform to this strict environment, in fact we rarely did, and whenever we strayed, Mum always gave us her unconditional love, support and positive guidance.
My father retired from the Police force in the 1990’s and they moved to Norfolk to start a small fruit farm. This was always one of their dreams and Mum loved the open space and the new start that the move gave them. A keen gardener, Mum loved working in her greenhouse growing and potting on plants to sell at the market. Unfortunately, their plans weren’t successful, so some years later they moved back to Dovercourt.
Being in Dovercourt, Mum was able to enjoy the long seaside walks with her dog. She would visit Mary regularly, and they enjoyed many cups of tea and copious glasses of sherry together. The sisters would often giggle together in a way that only happens when you’re very close, and that’s so very precious. They also had a passion for chocolate and anything sweet, which was something that Mum never lost. The sisters loved knitting and crochet and they made many wonderful outfits for babies and young children, together with an abundance of doilies! Mum made things with such precision and accuracy that it almost disguised the fact that they had been hand made.
The next two decades were to be extremely challenging for Mum who divorced our father in 2000. The following year Peter’s very sad and untimely death at the age of 49 from cancer was completely devastating to Mum, as it was to his son Paul and the rest of our family. Sadly Mum never fully recovered from such a premature and devastating loss. We often reminisced about the fun and happy times we had when Peter was with us. He and I used to tease Mum which made the three of us laugh a lot, and this gave Mum a huge amount of joy.
During the following years, Mum lived on her own and continued to enjoy her walks and seeing Mary. We visited her as often as possible to see and spoil her. Mum then moved to Molesey in 2009 so we could look after her more easily. She loved being closer to her family and walking her dog Molly along the Thames towpath.
Mum moved into Thameside Care home in December 2017. The staff there were and are simply amazing and they couldn’t have done more to ensure Mum’s comfort and contentment during the time when her life was being more and more impacted by her Alzheimer’s. I will be forever grateful for the ongoing dedication, professionalism, respect and dignity given to her by these highly skilled care givers. They truly loved Mum and she was extremely fortunate to have been part of the Thameside family.
Mum had a wicked sense of humour and a very expressive face. One of her favourite expressions while shrugging her shoulders and raising her eyebrows was “It’ll sort itself out” and I would like to thank everyone who, over the years, has contributed to making that happen.
A devoted and loyal wife, mother, and sister, Mum was entirely selfless and was always willing to help anyone she could if at all possible. She was very warm, affectionate and a great listener and always put everyone else before herself. She was kind, gentle, graceful, generous, very trusting and loved by everyone. She loved everything family, children, grandchildren and more recently her great granddaughter.
Whatever our beliefs I am confident that we can all take comfort in the fact that Mum is now in a better place, hopefully alongside Pete and her sisters Dorothy and Mary once more. I can’t think of anyone more deserving of our never ending love - God bless you Mum and may you rest in peace, contentment and happiness forever.